i’m definitely not the first person to think of this or feel this way, but it’s surprising how much this thought has been gnawing inside me.

i am so grateful to keep meeting wonderful people that i become friends with and get to spend time with. whether that’s from work or spending time with friends who introduce me to their friends, it’s so nice and precious to be able to connect with others.

however, it feels like breaking off pieces of my heart and leaving them with others. the more i make connections in different areas, the more long distance relationships these create. 

i will never be in a place surrounded by all my loved ones ever again.

this sounds much more dramatic than it really is, all i mean is that i will always be missing someone.

it’s unlikely that i will ever live at home again. my friends on the west coast are unlikely to move to the east coast, and if i move to the west coast, then i leave my east coast friends. who knows where my significant other will end up going until settling down. 

what’s the big deal about missing someone too? it feels like the precursor to complete grief. these are relationships that i treasure, i’d love to have them near me always.

because i’m me, i need some sort of resolution to this feeling, or lesson. this is telling me to treasure the time i have with those physically close to me, and make the most of it. grab the moment and make those plans. see if you can make plans and experiences with the others that you love as well and celebrate these relationships.

the final piece is gratitude, i am feeling so grateful for the time already spent and the individuals for sharing themselves and time with me.